Regret? Maybe a little

Often while filling slam books I used to wonder, what is my biggest regret? It felt so good to tell oneself “I have no regrets”. Its almost as if I didn’t know how to regret until now. Recent events have taught me how it feels to regret.

There was once a kid who wouldnt eat her lunch if Kuch Kuch Hota hai never played on TV, she cut her hair and started playing basketball after watching it 800 times over and over again. She would get teary eyed in Kal Ho Na Ho and would dance to Chaiyyan Chaiyyan. To cut it all short she adored Shahrukh Khan. His movies, his acting, his songs, his smile, his eyes and everyyyyyything about him was just about perfect. No matter what anyone said to her, her loyalty towards him or his movies wouldnt change for the world…
Each day she’d wonder how it would be to meet him in person…would she faint, would she cry out of joy or would she be standing in awe and let that opportunity go to waste? How did she know that opportunity had banged open the door and walked right into her life.

Temptations Reloaded 2013…after 10 years or so Shahrukh Khan was coming back to perform in Muscat…yes that place next to/near Dubai. How could she miss an event that she had been dreaming off since what seemed like forever? So as a birthday gift from a generous and most amazing father she got to travel all the way from Pune to meet the man himself in a place that she knew as home.

Day 1: Observation
All night music from his movies played and her heart skipped a beat…it strikes 12 and Prince Charming arrives in a BMW. All men who wear hoodies look adorable…how could he be an exception? As he walked past her onto the stage straight for his rehersals she stood there with her eyes wide open…wider than usual just staring…staring at perfection walk by her.

Day 2: Confrontation
She arrives backstage early next morning and is chosen to stand and stare at The King Khan dance around and laugh…could anything in the world get any better? In her bag is a photograph which she clicked in France (Grevin, Paris) of her and a wax model of what looked like SRK wearing a jacket of the real SRK and a pen so she could run upto him and ask for an autograph which he’d readily agree for. Next to her is her best friend clutching her phone so that she could get a pic of the scene.
As the blessed time arrives and SRK walks by not noticing anyone (due to the 8 layers of mean, rude, disgusting, bloody unreasonable bodyguards) she runnnnnnnnnnnssss and grabs the perfect opportunity for an autograph…as he signs “Love Shahrukh” she wonders how she wouldnt have stopped doing so even if this moment hadnt occurred in the first place. She wants to ask for a pic but is scared of denial…everyone glares at her as she takes up his precious 2 seconds to sign her picture…scared of being told off or denying her request for a picture…she manages to give up. He walks off, forgetting her face already…all set to perform in the next hour. She stands back happy and elated to have her pen touched by him and a pic signed by him…but what was fake never got a chance to get real. That is where the line is drawn from what we see on the reel and what we see in real.

She still has hope though that one day he’d work on a television or print campaign that she conceptualizes and during the shoot she would manage a picture with him…but then again tomorrow is another day and the future holds mysterious things for everyone. Yet she patiently waits…waits for their next meeting, to probably make it more memorable and maybe less regretful especially due to something so trivial as the fear of denial.

So till next time Shahrukh Khan I will be waiting because this great man once said;
Kitni shiddat se tumhe paane ki koshish ki hai.. Ki har zarre ne mujhe tumse milane ki saazish ki hai…Kehte hain agar kisi cheez ko dil se chaho to saari kayanath tumhe usse milane ki koshish me lag jaati hai…

Special Thanks to: Daddddd! Ketan Uncle, Shruti Chowdhary andddddddd Oman Air for making this possible for me 🙂