*Cue to play the Jaws theme song*

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “1984.”

 

The question posed here is this – “You are locked in a room with your greatest fear. Describe what’s in the room”

As I open the door, all I can think of is the incentive I shall get for this stupid dare I took up. There I was in swimming gear swooning into the room, the crystal blue water is always soothing to swim in. It’s like a swimming pool in a room and that’s always fun isn’t it? So what’s the catch? (He He He Fishermen Joke) As I peer through my goggles I can see a large object breathing on the floor of the room. It’s part white and part charcoal black and has a devilish grin…with more teeth than I can count.

My heart rate drops…it felt like my heart suddenly got up and said “Ain’t nobody got balls for that” and just hid in a box that had sign saying “Do not open till all clear of ‘shark’ objects”. As it swam towards me I could hear the background music go dun-dun! dun-dun! dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun-dun, da-na-na! (You wont believe me but my heart is racing just typing this blog post).

I swam to the sea bed I mean room floor or whatever. Since Deep Blue Sea, I had decided. I could die in the mouth of a lion, or burn to death or choke to death or get stabbed to death but NEVER will I even give an opportunity to myself to die in the mouth of a Great White Shark. Yes, I hate sharks. They are ugly scary. They are huge. They attack snorkling swimmers thinking they’re seals and then spit them out when they realise otherwise. They are scary as shit. Did I say they have teeth that can carve you into party streamers? Maybe that’s what Shark Birthday parties are like. A seal cake, human party streamers, blood shots, dancing to the Jaws Theme Song and all the jazz. Getting back to my story, I had watched this 48 minute documentary about the Great White Shark. That documentary spoke about it’s behaviour and characteristics. Remember this, if you, also like me do not want to die in a mouth of a shark, Sharks will never attack you sideways. They will always try and catch you by surprise i.e. from the under (See, devilish son of a wicked shark). So it’s best to always level yourself with it, or to swim sideways. I never thought the peeing on yourself trick would work with me, you see even to give a urine test, my bladder acts pricey even if I drink 2 lts of water, so when I’d probably need to pee during a shark attack my bladder will go “Nope. Not in the mood today woman”. Thus while the shark knew I was onto something it kept circling the room. That is not a good sign either, they always circle their food. It’s a mark of territory…like hey! that’s my food, I will now circle it because I can’t really take a marker and write my name on it or stamp “Shark Food” on it. Now it was all up to me to escape this living hell.

Stay tuned. Part 2 coming up. Yes. That is how the shark looks like in my story. He wants you to come back. Or else he will eat you like a Human BBQ Cocktail.

brucewallpaper

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