Gumption.

Iris: It’s over! This twisted, toxic thing between us — it’s finally finished! I’m miraculously done being in love with you! I’ve got a life to start living and you’re not going to be in it! Now, I’ve got somewhere to be and you have to get the hell out!”

Jasper (the ex): What exactly has got into you?

Iris: I don’t know, but I think what I’ve got is something slightly resembling gumption!

The above is an extract from my favourite romantic comedy – The Holiday. Apart from my Jude Law; Yes, he’s mine, get over it and stop drooling, the movie brings to life so many conflicts that we face in our lives, crisis that we all deal with and it’s treated as beautifully as Jude Law’s jawline. I haven’t written for a while and have been meaning to about gaining gumption.

Aren’t we always fascinated with the idea of the unknown? We’re so fixated on the ‘what ifs’ and ‘could haves’ that we start living 2 different lives. One is the real one, and the other one is a figment of our desires, the ‘what if’ world. I remember telling a friend how ridiculous the game ‘Sims’ was. I found the idea of playing a game to live a different life when your real one is already so exhausting, bizarre. Little did I know, I was playing a bigger game in my head all along.

In high school, my parents forbid me from talking on my cellphone post bedtime. Result? I’d sneak in my phone, talk to my friends till wee hours and it would totally be worth it, even if I had gotten like 5 or 4 hours of sleep. Now that I’m in my 20s, I literally put my phone on silent, switch my internet off and go to bed at 9 pm sometimes because SLEEP IS GOOD.

So this is what I’m trying to get at, no matter who tells you the right thing, you will never really understand it…truly, unless you learn your own lessons. Your BFF might have told you a 1000 times to not text that low life, but you do it anyway because you have hope that he’ll change AND the reason is you (Thanks a lot for setting unrealistic expectations Hoobastank). You probably have no money for dinner for another week but you WANT to buy that imported packet of Cheetos and it might be worth it right then because CHEETOS IS GOOD, but later, you’ll be starting to get tired of Maggi.

People always tell you to follow your heart, do what your gut tells you, but they forget to tell you that in the beginning it may all feel very liberating but later it may or may not destroy your soul depending on the kind of person you are. Thankfully, my soul isn’t destroyed. I’m so glad I did what my heart asked me to, only to forever close the door of ‘what ifs’ and finally walk down the road of what is.

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